Let it Marinate!

Are you in a relationship?

Yes honey, Let it marinate. I’m not talking about over night either. I’m saying give that relationship time!  Allow your hearts to become tender and flavorful for each other. It’s not a secret that relationships rely heavily on communication and forgiveness; but those qualities take time to master, so don’t rush the process.

I once believed that if I was in a relationship for a year then it would be a GREAT idea to get married. Boy, was I WRONG! After about three months, I could tell you all of my beaux’s strengths but it wasn’t until about a year that I could identify the true weaknesses.

I encourage you to always opt for a slow cooker relationship rather than a microwaved relationship. Learning and growing together over time creates a strong bond…so simmer down and cook it slowly.

Anyone can find a microwave relationship, it starts fast and ends fast. It’s not as tasty or beneficial,so take your time. There is no rush!  Your biological clock is not ticking and be HEALED of that baby fever in the name of Jesus! Hehe!

Strong relationships are built on a strong foundation

That foundation  is God, honey! The male and female are both imperfect but must  submit to God and learn to work together. Let’s be honest here, EVERYONE has strengths and weaknesses! It’s your job to admire and embrace the strengths but work through the weaknesses. It’s not easy but it allows you to grow as a couple. Allowing your relationship to marinate, creates a rich and flavorful bond. Don't be fooled, REAL LOVE takes TIME!  

There is beauty in the process, don’t rush it, enjoy it.

Stop trying to rush down the aisle and take time to  get to know them; people can put up a good front for a year. But, time will help reveal the truth of their character.

If you don't take your time now, you'll mess around, get married and wake up to a stranger, a liar, a cheater, a thief or worse...someone you actually hate.

But, I'm Still Single ...

If you aren’t married! You’re single!

Yes, I am in a relationship but my goodness I am still my own person. My boyfriend and I are complete opposites.  I am vibrant, adventurous and full of ideas and energy. He is more conservative, stable and reserved. He helps balance things out but this is not about him.

This is about being single! YAY!!!

When you are dating/courting you are TWO completely different people and it’s important that you don’t lose yourself in your relationship. If you are not careful, you can get completely invested in his dreams, his vision and his plans that you completely neglect your own. Dating or courting should never distract from your God-given purpose!

I AM A SINGLE WOMAN and I take myself on dates often and you should too!  I go on spontaneous adventures, go out to eat, try new things ALL alone! It sounds crazy but if you are confident in who you are alone, then you will be confident in your relationship. 

Your single season is your selfish season, don’t miss out on it!

If you are single woman who is not in a relationship, it can suck when you desire to be in a relationship but the right one hasn't come along yet. But let me warn you now, just because you get into a relationship doesn’t mean that loneliness goes away. Contrary to popular belief, your beaux won’t always be there for you 24/7. So, you better learn to ENJOY YOURSELF.

Buy yourself some flowers

Currently, I am obsessing over Ethos Vegan Kitchen and learning how to make healthy food… I frequent my favorite restaurant a few times a week ..ALONE! I haven’t tried everything on the menu yet but I'm getting there. 

BBQ Chick'n, Mash Potatoes, Collard Greens & Coleslaw

INVEST in yourself.

 Invest your time, money and energy into YOU! 

Simultaneously, I am starting a business and well that has been my dream for many years. I have always dreamed of being an entrepreneur, traveling the world, and helping others. Everyday, I clock in for my business. It’s not easy but it is definitely a journey. I get excited to learn new things and follow my dreams. 

Working for my favorite company! ;)

Before you Say I Do, I encourage you to truly get to know yourself, indulge in your passions and live out your God-given purpose.

Giving from A Pure Heart

Relationships are great teachers; they definitely teach you about your significant other but most importantly they teach you about yourself. Recently, I took a step forward in pruning one of my biggest flaws. My handsome teacher taught me that my giving was sometimes Impure!

This really bothered me because I thought I was an excellent giver. If anyone needed anything, I was always there willing to help and willing to give.

He showed me that sometimes my giving comes with conditions, and that sometimes I have ulterior motives for giving.

As painful as it was to hear. I took it and examined myself:

When I was a little girl, my baby sister was afraid of the dark. I would allow her to sleep in my room only if she paid me for my room services.

WRONG!

I firmly believe in “You reap what you sow.” So, I often give to others because if I am ever in need I would want someone to give to me.

WRONG!

Sometimes, I would remind my handsome teacher what I had done for him, so that he would give me something in return. MANIPULATIVE and …

WRONG!

Proverbs 16:2

"All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit."

This has truly taught me to check my motives in ALL things. I am more focused on making sure that I am doing things as unto the Lord and not for validation from man.

So,

Give without posting it on social media,

Give without wanting anything in return,

Give generously and genuinely.

These verses encourage me to give from a pure heart click here for a free PDF.

Your Words Could Kill You Relationship

Proverbs 18:21

"The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."

What does this even mean? It means the words you speak have power, which can bring positivity or negativity to someone.

A great example of speaking life would be from The Help:

"You is kind

You is smart

You is important."

Let’s hope that little Mae Mobley lived out those words.

But, an example of speaking death over someone could be:

You are no good.

You suck.

You are stupid.

You will never be able to achieve that.

When you are in a relationship, you usually talk to that special someone daily! It is important to realize that everyday, you have the ability to speak life into your significant other’s life and into your relationship as well. If you are constantly saying that relationships are hard or that things won’t work between you, then you have already brought hardship to the relationship. No one is perfect but is very important to watch your mouth! Always choose to speak life, even when things are tough! 

 I learned very quickly that it's not what you say but how you say it. Tact is a skill worth learning and could save you a lot of headache in a relationship. May the words that come out of your mouth be edifying to your significant other and pleasing to the ear of God.